|Friday, December 31st, 1999|
|written by Brenden again
Brotherly Love: The Story of Sarah Woytych
Sarah sat quietly, listening to the words of REO Speedwagon and how it related to her heartbreaking situation. "...And I can't fight this feeling anymore..." Indeed she could not fight this feeling anymore. The feeling that had plagued her body and mind for seven years. The feeling to have sexual relations with her invalid brother, Tim. After Tim's legs had been paralyzed in a kayaking incident of '92, Sarah's sexual misadventures had turned from sadomasicistic fantasies of alter boys, to violent sex crimes against the elderly + small animals.
|Thursday, October 28th, 1999|
I just got home about 15 minutes ago. Matt Simpson gave me a ride home from Denny's. He is this guy who goes out with my grrrl Toni Smith. He is also a DJ @ Anthony's. He is pulling some strings to try and help get me a job there. But I don't know if I really want to be a "dancer" (stripper, grrrr) It is so tempting though cause the money is soooo good. I can possibly make like $500 a night. That is so sweet. And I'd work only 2 or 3 days. At least a grand a week. Think think..........
|Wednesday, September 1st, 1999|
|Not even hit lunch yet and I'm already kicked out.
What the fuck.
I got caught smoking in the bathroom.
This is so fucked up. Insane.
Mom is going to kill me!
This fuckin sucks.
I guess I am gonna just go to Brenden's
I can't believe this.
Hopefully me and Will get together so possibly I could move in with him.
Then go to Springfield Schools and transfer to the Boston Rd Bickfords and Blockbuster.
Hi right now I am in 2nd period: computers. This is my schedual
1. Applied Math 2
5 classes. Cause they're like an hour and a half long. Blah. I don't want to be in school! I was so tired this morning. I couldn't even open my eyes.
|Tuesday, August 31st, 1999|
|you gotta be cool relax...crazy little thing called love -Queen
Will + Sarah=Yay!
fun fun for everyone
Now the only thing is about this Kevin character is that he is like 30. Oh well. He is skinny at least. Tyler just dropped me off. I let him come upstairs to see my Drew walls 1st tho. He's such a sweetie. He payed for my coffee + bought me a pack of Marbs. I was supposed to see Will tonight but some shit was goin down with his roomates so he had to bail. No prob tho. I will see him tomorrow. Can't wait. He's so rad. I want to go to sleep but I have so much caffine in me I'm not sure it's possible at this point.
(Insert small pic of Marilyn Manson)
Isn't that a cool pic of Manson? Yes I am kinda a closet Manson fan. But more a fan of his looks, attitude and philosophies than his music. Although some of it isn't too bad. I have training at Blockbuster tomorrow. Woo hoo. Well...I am gonna try to get some sleep. Nighty Night
P.S. Shaun wanted me to come over tonight to take a shower with him. He he. O well I had a nice time w/ Tyler tonight. Shaun will get his shower eventually. Unless Will just sweeps me off my feet. Late.
Right now I am at Denny's with Tyler. Having fun. Good convo. La la la I have to pee. Back. Fuckin Justin. He wrote I AM A SLUT. What an asshole. So there is this guy Kevin that I met here when I was 16. And now that I am almost 18 he wants to take me out. Hmmm. So I gave him my #.
|Saturday, August 28th, 1999|
I just woke up. I was supposed to be at a Wild Apples Catering thing at 9:45 or some shit. They still want me to go but I'd have to iron and take a shower still. Plus I am so tired. Last night I forgot to write about Amanda wanting to beat my ass. Because Leone had to open his big mouth and tell her about me and Arcott. Fuckin A. Well at least I don't have to go to school with her this year. Damn I lose friends quicker than anything. All of the old bands crew...Crystal...Bre...Tiana...now Amanda. This sucks. Oh well she messed around with one of his friends. (Leone) So why is it such a big deal if he messed around with one of her friends? Plus he doesn't even want to be with her. He said cause she goes to Comp. And if he has a girlfriend he doesn't want to see her everyday. Right now I am gonna try to write down all the phone #'s I can think of cause someone stole my purse.
(people on the list minus the phone numbers)
Amanda the Cunt
I think those are all that I can think of right now. It really sucks. My purse is somewhere in John Friel's house.
Right Now! Hey it's your tomorrow. Right now Come on it's everything.
Right now catch that magic moment. Do it right here and now. Oh right now. It means everything. Miss a beat you lost the rhythm and nothing falls into place. Only missed by a fraction. Slipped a little off your pace. Come on let's turn this thing around. -Right now by Van Halen.
I love Drew. Everyone knows that...La la la
Bye Bye Die Die
|Thursday, August 26th, 1999|
|Thursday, August 12th, 1999|
Helio. I am in the car. I am going to Bickfords to get my check right now. Yay. But Kate wants me to pay her back. I want to get my nipples pierced. Shit I have no check. That fuckin sucks. I am gonna kill Bickford's. That means I won't be seeing Mr Foley tonight. Dude I'm gonna try to take a nap. Late.
|Wednesday, August 11th, 1999|
I just woke up a little while ago. So far so good. No screaming heard from my mother. She would have woken me up way earlier. And she already has come into my room once today to ask me if I was going down to Sentry Uniform. Yeah, a while back I was trying to get a job at Sentry Cleaners. I filled out an application and brought it back. But they weren't hiring at the moment. So they told me to give my application to the uniform place. And they are just calling now! Wow things move pretty slow around there. So hopefully I will have 2 jobs soon. That will be good cause I really need the money. And I believe that Greg and Todd Riley both work there so that's cool. Actually they both got fired last weekend. But they'll probably get their jobs back. Well anyway I have to go get ready to go down there. Adios!
|Tuesday, August 3rd, 1999|
|Written by Brenden Silbaugh (it's a joke)
Dear dildo diary,
Diary, what am I to do. I went into the bathroom today and I didn't realize my brother Tim was in there! When I walked in he was standing on the sink and watching himself masturbate in the mirror! He didn't notice me at first, but then he turned and looked at me with a frightened face and proceeded to blow his load all over my favorite butterfly tee-shirt. Strangely, though I was attracted to this. But my inner desires to have sex with Tim were overshadowed by the fact that his "manhood" came up short. Oh dildo diary, what am I to do. I want to fuck him but I know his little love wand won't satisfy my cravings. I am going to sleep to think things over. I'll write tomorrow.
|Friday, October 9th, 1998|
Hello. Friday in school was just weird. Because it was Renaissance Day and we didn't have any classes all day (if you had cool teachers). The only class everyone had to stay in was 4th period because they didn't want to the cafeterias to be too crowded. So it was just kinda weird. I found myself walking around by myself a lot or being on the computer in the art room. It was sad. During the day I saw Princess in the hallway, I talked to her briefly about Tiana's accident and everything. Then she asked me if she could come over my house after school and stay over. I said sure, if she didn't mind staying there for 4 hours while I was at work. So she came home on the bus with me (because there wasn't enough room in Aaron's car for her.) I got home and around 3 I left w/ my mom to get my check, cash it, and help her pay some bills. I left Princess in my room. I saw Jim at Wendy's getting his check. I asked him if he was working that night and he said no. When I got back home I had to go right to work. Princess was all laying in my bed. I went to work, it was all right Dan was working. He's so cute. I think we sort of have a flirting thing going on. It's cute. I don't know if I wrote about the fact that I had a dream about him. Well, I did and I told him about it one day when I came in. Then Friday night he asked me about it. I didn't want to explain it to him, I told him that I was embarrassed. That night at work Jim came in. Just came walking by the back door. I wonder if he did that because he knew I was working? I don't know but that definitely would be cool. At work I talked to Evan. He was at this girl's house and was being pretty stupid. I told him to "just call me whenever". Friday night was weird. But I don't feel like writing about it all right now. Want to clean my room and take a shower so I can go to the mall, I haven't been there in so long! (I hope Mike's not working)
|Saturday, September 19th, 1998|
Yes! It's Friday. Finally. That's great. It's the end of 4th period and today 5th, 6th, & 7th period are shortened because we have a rally today. So I am leaving 7th period to go take the bus to the mall to meet Crystal. Sound firmiliar? Yes I know I did this at the Spirit Week Rally and Crystal never showed up. Well she better today. I'll be pretty pissed if she doesn't. So we are going to the mall. Then after the mall we (or I) are (am) supposed to go to Katelyn's play. I'm not sure if Crystal is going to come with me. Yesterday I went to the mall with Crystal and Aaron. Aaron called me and asked me if I wanted to go to the mall. After the mall Aaron dropped us off at the Elms College Library. Crystal's dad picked us up. Yuck. I think maybe Crystal and Aaron might hook up. I'm not sure though. I'm not positive if Aaron likes her and Crystal never knows who she likes. Lunch today sucked. I was sitting with the girls and Martha came over and sat down. That was fine. Then she waved Bryan over to sit next to her, right next to me. Why would she do that?! She doesn't want me talking to Bryan or even being around him so why would she make him sit across from me? I felt sick the whole time. It really sucked. I have no clue what I am going to do after the play.
Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television. Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin opener. Gangway! Run! Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed interest mortgage payments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose Leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three-piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose D.I.Y. and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind numbing spirit-crushing game shows stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Jammy goal. Choose rotting away at the end of it all. Pissing your last in a miserable home; nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish fucked-up brats you've spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life. But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose something else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you've got heroin? Goldfinger's better than Dr. No. Both of them are a lot better than Diamonds Are Forever. A judgement reflected in it's relatively poor showing at the box office. In which field of course Thunderball was a notable success. People think it's all about misery and desperation and all that shite which is not to be ignored. Fuck off! Jealous cunt! But what they forget is the pleasure of it. They're all dead right mate. You Prick. Otherwise we wouldn't do it. Do you want me to. Yeah. Pure as the driven snow that shit you done. After all we're not fucking stupid. At least we're not that fucking stupid.
|Friday, September 18th, 1998|
|videos that I want
The Song Remains the Same
Romeo & Juliet
Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
You're laughing a lot.
So what's up are you enjoying talking to him? Is he going to sleep over your house still?
Porn Tape of Crystal & Tony Ferris:
Jay Burns & Patience
Henry Stokowski Sr.
Everyone in the world
anal retentive: no definition
anal: 1. of or near the anus 2.psyxhonanalysis a) designating or of the second stage of psychosexual development, in which interest centers in excretory functions
b) designating or of such traits in the adult as orderliness, stinginess, and obstinacy, regarded as unconscious psychic residues of that stage
obstinacy: the state or quality of being obstinate; specif., a) stubbornness b) resistance to treatment; persistence, as of a disease 2) p! -cies an obsticate act, attitude, etc.
obstinate: 1. unreasonably determined to have one's own way; not yielding to reason or plea; stubborn; dogged; mulish 2. resisting remedy or treatment 3. not easily subdued, ended, etc, -SYN STUBBORN
dogged: not giving in readily; persistent, stubborn
mulish: like or characteristic of a mule; stubborn, obstinate, balky, etc
retentive: retaining or tending to retain 2. having the power or capacity for retaining 3. a) tenacious [a retentive memory] b) having a good memory
tenacious: 5. persistent; stubborn
but I know I better bite the bullet cause it's just another one of his jedi mind tricks-POE
ALL IT TOOK WAS A FAT CHRONIC BLUNT-JAY
that which does not kill us make us stronger
lucky number: 64 compatible sign: Gemini
you had to know that I loved you-EC
Oh Come On Now!-JN
Who can Take Us: Aaron (Probably not)
Interstate 91 South Get to CT Somers Exit 47 East Route 190 7.5-8 miles. Mobile on Right take a Right onto Route 83
Chris St 1.5 down on Right. White House Garage 192
- 2.75 Pizza/H2o
3.00 Ice Cream
7 YEAR BITCH
7 YEAR BITCH
I WANT IT GIVE IT TO ME I LOVE IT DON'T GIVE IT TO HER YOU GOTTA GIVE IT TO ME ME ME ME ME ME ME
5 for Lunch
3.00 Pizza H2O at mall 2/22
17.00 CD? Bikini Kill Pussy Whipped
8.oo 2 Denny's visits
1.75 Drink at Mall 2/22
-5.00 For Lunch
Kelly- At work
Brett & Martha
$94.50 without taxes
So you wanted to take a break
Slow it down some and have some space
Well fuck you too
Give me my money back
I want my money back
And don't forget to give me back my black T-Shirt
I wish I hadn't
bought you dinner
Right before you
Dumped me on your front porch
Give me my money back
Give me my money back you bitch
And don't forget
|Friday, May 15th, 1998|
Ahh! I'm flippin out! I lost my purse. I'm never going to fall asleep in school again! I know I had it in 3rd period because I took my pen out of it. Then I ended up falling asleep in that class. At the end of the class I woke up and went to 4th. I fell asleep there also. When it was time for lunch I woke up and was all ready to go to lunch when I couldn't find my purse. I went back to my English Class twice and it's definitely not in there. So I think someone either stole it or picked it up for me. But I think someone just took it. It sucks! I didn't have any money in it but so much more. Let's see if I can remember it all.
Green Sparkly Wallet w/ pictures
my yearbook receipt
my library card
my blockbuster card
my turn it up card (!)
I'm not sure what else is in my wallet.
My school ID
my Strawberry-Lemonade body splash
my sun ripened raspberry anti-bacterial gel & lotion
my favorite eye shadow kit (Katelyn's too)